RJ Gets Fired at UCLA!!!

[Reginald Rutledge]

UCLA Fires Robert "The Militant" Jackson

The enigmatic Robert Jackson was fired today at UCLA for "behavior unbecoming to a head coach". Jackson, the much traveled coaching gypsy was terminated from his 4th coaching position before the start of his inaugural season in the CBSMF League. Jackson, who was given a five year contract at USC was let go after recruiting violation allegations was then hired by Oregon. Before Jackson could even sign his first prospect, it was found out that he had improperly made calls to recruits that were signed at other universities. He was fired from Oregon and hired on a temporary basis at Miami only to find out he had outstanding warrants in the Miami area.

Jackson then was approached by Florida State and signed as an interim by the school President. "We knew the past history of coach Jackson but felt with his winning record, he could help us if he kept things clean." However, that was not the case at Florida State as he was caught at fraternity and sorority parties in compromising positions. Florida State banned Jackson before he made his first coaching hire. Jackson, for whatever the reason, was then approached by UCLA and was hired on a 24-hour trial basis only to find that he was fired because of public drunkedness on an alcoholic beverage called Tanquerey. UCLA decided to terminate his contract.

Unfortunately, great coaches continue to get opportunities and Penn State and Happy Valley called on Coach Jackson to restore the roar. Jackson says this is a dream job which he would have accepted at the start had he not known it was still open. "I have always wanted to coach in Happy Valley and I look forward to doing the right things from here on out and making Penn State a national champion contender".

One can only wonder on the sincerity of Coach Jackson as he has jumped programs like a frog jumping across a lilipond. Stay tuned for Jackson's next big adventure. It's getting old to his fan club!