The Fantasy Football season.....

[RavennaAl]

Killer Bees 42 - Third Reich 7

Peter Pollen returned a kickoff for a TD and the Bees rushed for a combined 5 TD’s as Kalamazoo routed the Third Reich 42 - 7. Wilhelm Klink was under constant pressure all day from a ferocious Bee defense, completing only 4 of 13 passes and was sacked twice, fumbling once, in Munich’s 3rd loss in a row.

The game started off looking like it would be a defensive struggle until Pollen ripped off a 54 yard TD run at the end of the 1st quarter putting the Bees up 7 - 0 . Little used halfback Sam Swarm, the younger brother of the Bees’ stellar running back Steve Swarm, scored the first TD of his career from 1 yard out to extend the Bees lead to 14 -0 at the end of the half.

Pollen returned the second half kick 86 yards for a score to make it 21-0 Kalamazoo. Klink connected with Gunther Huber on a 50 yard strike that set up Fritz Mueller’s 12 yard run to cut the deficit to 21-7. It was all Killer Bees from then on. Pollen scored from 38 yards out, and the Swarm brothers added a TD each for the final score. Pollen had 138 yards rushing on 9 carries and Steve Swarm ran for 133 yards on 7 carries for Kalamazoo.

Elliott Gould had a career high 7 tackles, Mudd Dauber and Doug Drone had a sack apiece and Hank Hornet added an interception to lead the Bees defense. Manfred Mann and Klaus Werner had 3 tackles each for Munich.


Killer Bees were everywhere, as Klink was swarmed everytime he went back to pass

[RavennaAl]

Sasquatch 49 - Bozos 42


Once again Battle Creek got itself into a huge hole to start the game, and once again they nearly pulled it out, but despite Pi’s 348 yard, 3 TD performance, it wasn’t quite enough as the Sasquatch hung on to win a wild game, 49 - 42.

The game got off to an ominous start for the clowns, as Muckman returned the opening kick 88 yards for a score to put the big guys up 7-0. Then, on their first offensive play of the game, a 10 yard holding penalty negated what would have been a 73 yard TD pass to tie the game. Instead, 3 plays later Ralph intercepted Pi’s pass to give the ‘Quatch great field position at the Bozo 26. 4 plays later Muckman ran it in from the 3 making the score 14 - 0. Battle Creek couldn’t generate any offense and was forced to punt. Grog wasted little time and rambled 22 yards to make it 21-0 at the end of one.

The Canadians got the ball back to start the second quarter, and Stinkwater’s 25 yard TD pass to Tipper capped off a 9 play, 68 yard drive to push the lead to a commanding 28 - 0. The Bozos came right back and Pisces’ 54 yard reception from Pi made it 28 - 7 at halftime.

5 ½ returned the second half kick 26 yards to give Battle Creek great field position at their 37. 8 plays later, Pi snuck in from 1 yard out to trim the lead to 28 - 14. The ‘Quatch used their one-two punch of Muckman and Grog, and Grog’s 16 yard TD run made it 35 - 14. More or Less returned the ensuing kick 66 yards to the ‘Quatch 33, then followed that up by scoring on the first play to tighten the score 35-21. Tipper’s 30 yard catch in the end zone on the last play of the quarter made it 42-21 going into the 4th.

The fourth quarter will go down as one of the wildest in WMLMF history. Pi completed 3 passes in a row, and More or Less punched it in from 8 yards out to make the score 42 - 28. The Bozos then tried an onside kick that was initially recovered by the Sasquatch, but a flag on the play gave the clowns another chance, and they made the most of it by covering the ball at the ‘Quatch 45. The Sasquatch defense stiffened, but on 4th and 15, 2 Cents made a great catch in the corner of the end zone, and suddenly the clowns were only down by one score. The Bozos then recovered another on sides kick, and when 1.4 caught a 65 yard bomb from Pi to tie the game, the Canadians were clearly getting nervous. With time running out, the ‘Quatch went to Muckman once more, and he came through with a stunning 55 yard TD run to put the Bigfoot team back up. 49-42. 2 Cents then returned the kick 59 yards to put the clowns within reach at the ‘Quatch 40. More or Less caught a Pi pass and went out of bounds at the 21 with time for one last play. Again, More or Less was open and caught a pass, but in a play reminiscent of the Rams-Titans Super Bowl, Thinker made a game saving tackle at the 3 yard line giving the Sasquatch their first win over the Bozos in 3 tries.

Pi finished the game 13-22-1 for 348 yards and 3 TD’s and 2 Cents ran for 49 yards on 9 carries. Stinkwater was a perfect 5-5-0 , 92 yards and 2 TD’s while Muckman ran for 197 yards on 14 carries and 2 TD’s. Greaterthanfour led the clowns on defense with 4 ½ tackles while Patches topped the ‘Quatch with 3 tackles and a sack.


The Sasquatch came out in the first quarter playing physical, as the Bozos were knocked down on almost every play

[RavennaAl]

Zombies 31 - Fairies 7

Willie Davis was almost a one-man defense for New Zealand, recording 7 ½ tackles and 3 sacks as the Zombies held San Francisco to only 27 yards rushing in a 31-7 rout. Four different players scored for New Zealand as they upped their record to 2-1.

The 1st quarter was a defensive gem, as neither team could move the ball much. Willie Wood’s interception gave the Zombies great field position at the Fairies 30 as the gun sounded to end the 1st quarter with a scoreless tie. Three plays into the 2nd found Jerome Bettis running it in from 5 yards out to give the team from down under the lead, 7-0. A three and out gave the ball back to the Zombies, and Dan Fouts connected with Tim Brown on a 46 yard TD pass to increase their lead, 14-0. A smothering defense forced the Fairies to punt again, and this time Marcus Allen hit pay dirt with an 80 yard TD run that gave New Zealand a 21-0 lead at halftime.

The third quarter was much like the first, as both teams struggled to move the ball. Adam Vinatieri’s field goal was the only score as New Zealand took a 24 - 0 lead going into the final quarter. The Fairies averted a shutout when Mike “Moonwalker” Jackson hauled in a Tommy Cruise pass and danced his way 64 yards for a TD, cutting the lead to 24-7. Curtis Martin then finished out the scoring on a slick 41 yard run for the final score of 31-7.

Cruise led the Fairies on 12-22-1 passing for 183 yards and a TD. Marcus Allen ran for 188 yards on 9 carries and a TD to lead the Zombies. On defense, Charles Mann also had a sack and a forced fumble for New Zealand while Dick Wanker had a sack for San Francisco.


Johnny Holmes, #45, gets open in the flat, as not much went right for the Fairies

[RavennaAl]

Midwest Mennonites 35- Three Mile Island Toxic Waste 28

Speedy Ezekiel ran for 2 TD’s and caught a pass for another as the Mennonites improved their record to 2-1 with a narrow 35-28 victory over a stubborn Toxic Waste team. George Dubya threw for 196 yards and 2TD’s but it wasn’t quite enough for the 1-2 Waste.

Orenthal Simpson opened the game with a 65 yard TD pass from Dubya to give Three Mile Island a quick 7-0 lead. Speedy answered with a 50 yard TD run, then followed that with a 60 yard TD reception to put the Amish up 14-7 at the end of one.

Luthar Lamp capped off an impressive 11 play, 83 yard drive with a 15 yard TD run of his own to push their lead to 21-7. Not to be outdone, Simpson scored on a 61 yard scamper to pull the Waste within 7, 21-14 at the half.

Steve Colbert’s TD midway through the third tied the game at 21 all. A 60 yard kick return by Ezekiel gave the Mennonite excellent field position, and Mudder Smuckers 7 yard TD catch put the Amish back up on top, 28-21 going into the final quarter. After an exchange of kicks, Colbert caught a Dubya pass and raced 53 yards to once again tie the game at 28. Lamp took advantage of special teams breakdowns by the Waste and returned the kick 59 yards to the Waste 31. Speedy’s 19 yard TD run finished the scoring for the day and gave the Mennonites the victory.

Simpson finished the day rushing for 115 yards on 8 carries and a TD for the Waste, while Billy Bob Weisser was an efficient 7-12-0 128 yards and 2 TD’s for the Mennonites. Colon Powell led the Waste with 4 tackles on defense, while Billy Yoder had 3 tackles and an interception to lead the Amish.


Speedy Ezekiel is wide open on this 1st quarter TD catch

[RavennaAl]

Standings after third week:


NORTH
TEAM ..... W/L............ PF............ PA
Sasquatch 3 - 0......... 112............ 94
Killer Bees.. 2 - 1......... 91............. 56
Bozos...... 1 - 2.......... 101............ 108
Third Reich 0 - 3......... 69............ 115

UN_NORTH
Zombies..... 2 - 1........... 86.......... 59
Mennonites. 2 - 1........... 93.......... 73
Fairies....... 1 - 2........... 55.......... 93
Toxic Waste 1 - 2........... 84......... . 93

[styx]

hey al, dude your teams look so sweet , love what you've done with them , im pulling for grog and the boys from boogy creek .....lol good luck with your season.





there's nothing to fear, but fear itself unlless your playing the colts

Here come my fightin' Mennonites!!!! God bless'em!!!

[RavennaAl]

Stats after third 'week' of play

Leading Rushers

......Player ............... Team............. Yards/Att....... Ave....... Tds

1) Muckman........... Sasquatch........ 471 / 38....... 12.4....... 5
2) Grog................ Sasquatch......... 469 / 40....... 11.7....... 8
3) Marcus Allen…... Zombies………...... 424 / 29.…... 14.6.…... 6
4) Speedy Ezekiel... Mennonites ....... 354 / 38....... 9.3....... 5
5) Steve Swarm..... Killer Bees ........ 352 / 26....... 13.5....... 2
6) Peter Pollen....... Killer Bees ........ 279 / 30....... 9.3....... 5
7) Luthar Lamp…... Mennonites…….... 245 / 32...…… 7.7.…..… 2
8) Jerome Bettis..... Zombies............. 193 / 33....... 5.8....... 2
9) Richard Meier… Third Reich….......… 187 / 34.….... 5.5.…..… 1
10) Orenthal Simpson. Toxic Waste...... 170 / 26....... 6.5........ 2

Passing Leaders

..........Player...........Team .......... Comp - Att - Int - TD’s... Yards


1) Tommy Cruise... Fairies............ 32 - 48 -3..... 5 TD’s..... 566 yds
2) Wilhelm Klink.... Third Reich....... 22 - 40 - 4..... 5 TD’s..... 528 yds
3) Pi................... Bozos............. 20 - 36 - 4..... 5 TD‘s...... 490 yds
4) Billybob Weisser Mennonites ..... 23 - 36 - 0..... 6 TD‘s...... 434 yds
5) George Dubya .. Toxic Waste... 21 - 30 - 3..... 6 TD‘s..... 422 yds
6) Kerry Kingbee.. Killer Bees....... 18 - 27 - 2..... 3 TD‘s........ 327 yds
7) Starr/Fouts **... Zombies........ 14 -22 - 0..... 1 TD’s..... 286 yds
8) Stinkwater....... Sasquatch....... 13 - 19 - 3..... 2 TD’s..... 208 yds

** The Zombies alternate QB's during the course of the game between Bart Starr and Dan Fouts

Leading Receivers

Player ................. Team........... Catches - yards... TD’s

1) Target................ Bozos............ 7 - 198...... 2 TD’s
2) Speedy Ezekiel..... Mennonites..... 6 - 184...... 2 TD's
3) Mike Jackson........ Fairies.......... 10 - 182..... 1TD
4) George B. Hive..... Killer Bees....... 5- 178...... 2 TD’s
5) Willie Wolf........... Third Reich..... 5 - 177...... 2 TD’s
6) Steve Colbert…… Toxic Waste….. 6 - 60.....… 2 TD's
7) Mudder Smucker.. Mennonites.... 10 - 158.…. 2 TD's
8) James Leach……... Fairies……...... 6 - 145.…... 2 TD’s
9) Gunther Huber....... Third Reich..... 5 - 138..... 0 TD's
10) Gene Simmons..... Fairies........... 6 - 136...... 1 TD



Sacks

Player............ Team....... #

1) Willie Davis... Zombies... 3
2) Charles Mann Zombies... 2
2) Doug Drone Killer Bees... 2
Five tied with 1


Interceptions

Player....... Team...... #

1) Norman Nest Killer Bees 3
Sixteen tied with 1


Leading Tackles

Player............... Team......... # Tackles

1) Elliott Gould.......... Killer Bees........ 14 1/2
2) One Eleven………. Bozos…………..….... 13
3) Willie Davis....... Zombies............... 12 1/2
4) Greaterthanfour... Bozos................. 12
4) Mudd Dauber....... Killer Bees........... 12
4) Tank.................... Sasquatch........ 12
7) Colon Powell.......... Toxic Waste...... 11 1/2
8) Carlos Helu……… Toxic Waste…........ 11
9) Willie Brown.......... Zombies........... 10 1/2
10) Dirk Lange............. Third Reich....... 10
10) Sam Smucker……. Mennonites........ 10

[RavennaAl]

Next 'weeks' games and odds....

Zombies (+7) vs. Sasquatch

Mennonites (-10) vs. Third Reich

Flaming Fairies (+2) vs. Bozos

Toxic Waste (+8) vs. Killer Bees

[styx]

im picking the squatch , menenites , bozos and killer bees