The Fantasy Football season.....

[RavennaAl]

The 'week' 4 results are in.....


Flaming Fairies 17 - Bozos 17

It was a game of blown opportunities for both teams as the Fairies and Bozos played to a 17 all draw. Three sacks and an interception by the Bozo defense countered a poor performance by their quarterback, Pi while 7 penalties for 55 yards negated a fine performance by Fairies quarterback, Tommy Cruise.

The game got off to a great start for San Francisco as Cruise completed 3 of 5 passes during a long 80 yard, 14 play drive that resulted in a 21 yard TD catch by their tight end, Gene Simmons. The Bozos struck back quickly on a 1 yard dive by More or Less to make the score 7-7 at the end of one. The Fairies drove to the Bozos 13, but had to settle for a field goal by Pat Medown following a sack on Cruise by One Eleven. A nice catch by 5 ½ got the clowns deep into Fairy territory where Bernie’s 32 yard field goal tied the game at 10 at the half.

The clowns took a 17-10 lead midway through the third quarter on a 32 yard TD run by 5 ½. After an exchange of punts, the Fairies drove 63 yards in 10 plays and tied the game on Simmons’ second TD catch. Both sides had a chance to win the game in the final minutes, but neither team was able to mount any sort of offense, and the game ended in a 17 all draw.

2 Cents led the Bozo offense, rushing for 113 yards on 7 carries, while Pi had the worst game of his career, finishing 1-6-1 for only 17 yards and was sacked once. The Fairies’ Cruise was 8-13-1 and 2 TD’s. On defense, Rod Stroker had 3 tackles and a sack for San Francisco while One Eleven was a beast for Battle Creek with 6 tackles and 2 sacks.


More or Less takes it in from one yard out in early first quarter action

[RavennaAl]

Canadian Sasquatch 23 - New Zealand Zombies 7

The Sasquatch were in complete control as their much maligned defense throttled the high powered Zombie offense for a 23-7 win. Gopher had 2 interceptions and Junior added another as the big guys came within minutes of registering their first shutout.

The ‘Quatch were methodical in taking the opening drive down to the Zombie 15 yard line, where Bunyons’ 32 yard field goal gave them a 3-0 lead. New Zealand could not muster much of anything offensively, as the Bigfoot team held Marcus Allen, the leagues third leading rusher, to a total of 10 yards for the game. A 69 yard TD pass to Grog from Stinkwater made it 10-0 . Gopher’s 1st interception and Muckman’s 67 yard run upped the score to 17-0 at the half.

The team from down under had a brief glimmer of hope when Donnie Shell picked off a Stinkwater pass, giving the Zombies the ball near mid-field, but Junior’s interception gave the ball right back to the Canadians. A pair of Bunyon field goals gave the Sasquatch a commanding 23-0 lead. Their efforts to record their first shutout were thwarted, however; when Dan Fouts hooked up with Billy “Whiteshoes” Johnson on a 43 yard TD pass. Their onsides attempt was recovered by the ‘Quatch who ran out the clock to end the game.

Stinkwater was 3-4-1 with 1 TD and 119 yards. Fouts and Bart Starr combined on 10-21-3 passing for 149 yards and a TD. Charles Mann and Deacon Jones shared top defensive honors with 3 1/2 tackles each for New Zealand. Tank had 4 tackles for the ’Quatch.


Grog (#32) takes a short screen pass from Stinkwater and goes 69 yards for a TD

[RavennaAl]

Mennonites 34 - Third Reich 28

“Do you believe in Miracles?” could be the motto for the Amish team, as Luthar Lamp scored on the game’s final play to keep the Mennonites in fist place in the Un-North division. The Mennonites sacked Wilhelm Klink once, and intercepted him twice in what was one of the most physical games played this year.

Lamp scored on a 56 yard burst on the games opening drive to put the men in black up, 7-0. Richard Meier then fumbled the ball on a vicious hit by Billy Yoder, as you could hear the plastic cracking up in the press box. Lamp scored his 2nd TD moments later and it was 14-0 going into the second quarter.

Brian Brenneman made his first interception of the year on a poorly thrown Klink pass, and 2 plays later Speedy Ezekiel caught a 52 yard bomb from Weisser to make it 21-0 Mennonites. Yoder’s interception gave the Amish excellent field position at Munich’s 38. The Mennonites were poised to increase the lead until Weisser threw his first interception of the year when Wolfgang Hahn stepped in front of a fallen receiver to end the half. The crowd was yelling for a pass interference penalty, but the refs made it clear that they were going to let the two teams duke it out.

The Germans came out in the second half fired up, and Meiers 41 yard TD run put them on the board, 21-7. Lamp decided that he was going to carry the Amish on his back, and scored his 3rd TD of the day to push the lead back up to 28-7. Willie Wolf’s clutch 3rd and 15 catch kept the Reich’s next drive alive, and Fritz Mueller scored from 18 yards out to make it 28-14. Munich then recovered an on-sides kick, and Mueller’s second TD run of the day closed the score to 28-21. A three and out gave the ball back to Munich, and Klink guided the Germans down the field. Peter Becker’s catch at the one yard line gave the Reich a first and goal, and 2 plays later Klink ran it in to tie the game with just seconds remaining. The ensuing kick was a touchback, and it looked like the Third Reich was going to get their first non-loss game of the year. Time for one last play, the “Bible Thumper”threw an innocent looking screen pass to Lamp. Surrounded by Germans, Lamp made a juke move that literally spun the Third Reich defenders around and ran down the sidelines for an 80 yard TD to snatch victory out of thin air.

Weisser finished the day 5-9-1 for 180 yards and 2 TD’s and Lamp ran for 127 yards. Klink was 9-17-2 and 158 yards. Derrick Danker had 4 tackles for Munich while the Amish were led by Deoder Yoder’s 4 tackles and Samuel Smucker’s sack.


Luthar Lamp scores on the last play of the game, hugging the right sideline

[RavennaAl]

Killer Bees 21 - Toxic Waste 7

Kerry Kingbee didn’t have a very good game, but as it turned out, it didn’t matter as the Bees defense smothered the Waste with 4 interceptions and 3 sacks as they won the game, 21-7. The Waste defense was pretty good on it’s own, holding Kalamazoo, who was averaging 340 yards a game, to just 148 yards of total offense, but it just wasn’t enough.

The game started off looking like it was going to be a wide open affair. Steve Swarm’s 64 yard TD run 2 plays into the game gave the Bees a quick 7-0 lead. A few plays later, George Dubya’s 55 yard pass to Steve Colbert tied the game at 7 all. From there it just got plain nasty. A series of punts and interceptions by the Bees’ Jerry Yellowjacket, Toxic Waste’s Don King, and again by Kalamazoo’s Willie Wasp had the Bees knocking at the Waste 38 yard line. From there, Swarm had another TD run to make it 14-7 at halftime.

Three Mile Island got some good field position in the third quarter, but Norman Nest picked off his league leading 4th pass of the year and returned it 76 yards untouched for a TD, making the score 21-7 Killer Bees. The Waste were forced to punt and pinned Kalamazoo deep at their own 5 yard line. Don Kings second interception of the game gave the Waste the ball at the Bee 16 yard line with plenty of time left in the game. The Waste moved the ball down to the 2 yard line, but on second and goal, Nest made his 2nd pick of the game in the end zone. Peter Pollen picked up a crucial first down and the Bees were able to run out the clock for the win.

Orenthal Simpson ran for 42 yards for Three Mile Island and Colbert added 36. Swarm led the Bees with 105 yards and 2 TD’s. Colon Powell and Jessie Jackson each had 3 tackles for the Waste, while league leader Elliott Gould made 6 tackles and Garrett Morris added 3 tackles and 2 sacks for Kalamazoo.


Garrett Morris, #91, sacks George Dubya

I know I've said this before, but this looks like such a blast! Talk about serendipity. I love the league logo with the trick flower and the football....just awesome!

[RavennaAl]

Thanks MW. The logo is for the Battlin' Bozos. I only have 2 field covers so far, and most of the games have been played on the Bozos home field. I don't have a league logo yet, but I will as soon as I get logos for the remaining 4 teams. Now, here's the standings after 4 'weeks'



NORTH
TEAM ..... W/L............ PF............ PA
Sasquatch 4-0......... 135............ 101
Killer Bees.. 3-1......... 112............ 63
Bozos...... 1-2-1...... 118............ 125
Third Reich 0-4......... 97............ 149

UN_NORTH
Mennonites. 3-1........... 127........ 101
Zombies..... 2-2........... 93.......... 82
Fairies....... 1-2-1........ 72.......... 110
Toxic Waste 1-3........... 91......... 114

[styx]

looks like its going to go down to the big guys and the mennenites

[HOOP]

This is actually my first time clicking in here. Boy, what i have missed!!!

I am cracking up. Great job Al, and better creativity.

The Diva will go in the mail today or tomorrow my friend.
I am trying to find something to pack him in safely.

Scott

[RavennaAl]

Thanks Scott, looking forward to adding Tiny Tim to the team. Phil, The big guys have been all business so far, but there's still 6 'weeks' to go. It's still anybodies game, with maybe the exception of the Third Reich, they're so close to winning, but just can't quite get a grasp of victory. History sort of repeating itself. Anyrate, here's the stats after 4 'weeks'...


Leading Rushers

......Player ............... Team............. Yards/Att....... Ave....... Tds

1) Grog................ Sasquatch......... 562 / 48....... 11.7....... 8
2) Muckman........... Sasquatch........ 556 / 52....... 10.7....... 6
3) Marcus Allen…... Zombies………...... 434 / 32.…... 13.6.…... 6
4) Speedy Ezekiel... Mennonites ....... 413 / 50....... 8.3....... 5
5) Peter Pollen....... Killer Bees ........ 384 / 37....... 10.4....... 7
6) Steve Swarm..... Killer Bees ........ 383 / 36....... 10.6....... 2
7) Luthar Lamp…... Mennonites…….... 372 / 41...…… 9.1.…..… 5
8) 2 Cents........... Bozos............... 260 / 38......... 6.8........ 0
9) Richard Meier… Third Reich….......… 225 / 44.….... 5.1.…..… 2
10) Orenthal Simpson. Toxic Waste...... 212 / 35....... 6.1........ 2

Passing Leaders

..........Player...........Team .......... Comp - Att - Int - TD’s... Yards


1) Tommy Cruise... Fairies............ 40 - 61 -4..... 7 TD’s..... 711 yds
2) Wilhelm Klink.... Third Reich....... 31 - 57 - 6..... 5 TD’s..... 686 yds
3) Billybob Weisser Mennonites ..... 26 - 45 - 1..... 8 TD‘s...... 614 yds
4) Pi................... Bozos............. 21 - 42 - 5..... 5 TD‘s...... 507 yds
4) George Dubya .. Toxic Waste... 27 - 45 - 7..... 7 TD‘s..... 507 yds
6) Starr/Fouts **... Zombies........ 24 -33 - 3..... 2 TD’s..... 435 yds
7) Kerry Kingbee.. Killer Bees....... 19 - 33 - 4..... 3 TD‘s........ 339 yds
8) Stinkwater....... Sasquatch....... 16 - 23 - 4..... 3TD’s..... 327 yds

** The Zombies alternate QB's during the course of the game between Bart Starr and Dan Fouts

Leading Receivers

Player ................. Team........... Catches - yards... TD’s

1) Speedy Ezekiel..... Mennonites..... 8 - 244...... 3 TD's
2) Steve Colbert…… Toxic Waste….. 7 - 215.....… 3 TD's
3) Willie Wolf........... Third Reich..... 6 - 207...... 2 TD’s
4) Luthar Lamp......... Mennonites..... 6 - 202........ 2 TD's
5) Target................ Bozos............ 7 - 198...... 2 TD’s
6) Mike Jackson........ Fairies.......... 10 - 182..... 1TD
7) George B. Hive..... Killer Bees....... 5- 178...... 2 TD’s
8) Gene Simmons..... Fairies........... 8 - 168...... 3 TD's
9) Antoine Devries..... Fairies........... 6 - 165........ 1 TD
10) Mudder Smucker.. Mennonites.... 10 - 158.….. 2 TD's




Sacks

Player................. Team....... #

1) Willie Davis...... Zombies..... 3
1) Doug Drone...... Killer Bees... 3
3) Charles Mann... Zombies....... 2
3) Too Tall.......... Sasquatch... 2
3) Garrett Morris... Killer Bees... 2
3) One Eleven...... Bozos.......... 2

Eight tied with 1


Interceptions

Player................ Team...... #

1) Norman Nest....... Killer Bees... 5
2) Wolfgang Hahn.... Third Reich.. 2
2) Billy Yoder.......... Mennonites.. 2
2) Don King............ Toxic Waste.. 2
2) Gopher.............. Sasquatch... 2

Sixteen tied with 1


Leading Tackles

Player............... Team......... # Tackles

1) Elliott Gould.......... Killer Bees........ 20 1/2
2) One Eleven………. Bozos…………..….... 19
3) Mudd Dauber....... Killer Bees........... 17
4) Tank.................... Sasquatch........ 16
5) Colon Powell.......... Toxic Waste...... 14 1/2
6) Greaterthanfour... Bozos................. 14
7) Willie Davis....... Zombies............... 13 1/2
8) Willie Brown.......... Zombies........... 12 1/2
9) Carlos Helu……… Toxic Waste…........ 12
9) Rod Stroker........ Fairies................. 12

[RavennaAl]

Games for 'week' 5 and odds....

Zombies (2-2) over Bozos (1-2-1) by 7 points

Killer Bees (3-1) over Mennonites (3-1) by 2 points

Sasquatch (4-0) over Fairies (1-2-1) by 10 points

Toxic Waste (1-3) over Third Reich (0-4) by 4 points