The Fantasy Football season.....

[styx]

killer bees against the mennonites will be the game of the week, there to close to pick .

[HOOP]

Is it too late for the Tiny Tim to get into this weeks game?
He would be sure to put the team over the top. His plane should arrive tomorrow.
BTW- he wants his own office in the clubhouse and a personal male secretary.

whattayagonnado???

[RavennaAl]

Scott, the Fairies are going to get a makeover soon. I'll use Tiny Tim as a model for their new uni's. He'll be on their roster for next years season, that's for sure. Ok, 'week' 5 is over, here's the results.......

Toxic Waste 48 - Third Reich 20

Orenthal Simpson had his best day since he played for the Buffalo Bills as he ran for 176 yards and 3 TD’s and returned a kick 98 yards for another in Three Mile Islands 48-20 beating of the Third Reich. George Dubya was equally impressive for the Waste as he threw for 2 TD’s and ran for a score.

Simpson scored on the opening drive on a 12 yard run to put Three Mile Island up 7-0. Dubya connected with Steve Colbert on a 41 yard toss to make it 13-0 midway through the first as the extra point attempt failed. Wilhelm Klink brought the Reich back on a 25 yard TD pass to Willie Wolf to close the score to 13-7 at the end of the first quarter.

Simpson scored again from 48 yards out to put the Waste up 20-7. Wolf’s second TD of the game made it 20-13 as the German’s missed their extra point attempt. Simpson then scored his 3rd TD of the day from 15 yards out to end the half with the Toxic Waste in front, 27-13.

In the third quarter, Dubya threw a 26 yard strike to Terry Owens to push the lead to 34-13. Sven Wagner gave the Reich fans some hope as he ran the kickoff back 95 yards for a score. Their hopes for a comeback were dashed on the ensuing kick as Simpson rocketed 98 yards for a TD and a commanding 41-20 lead heading into the final quarter. George Dubya scored from one yard out to culminate a long 83 yard, 14 play drive for the final score, 48-20.

Colbert had 93 yards rushing for Three Mile while Klink was 7-15-2 for 161 yards and 2 TD’s for Munich. The Waste defense was led by Don King’s 3 tackles and 2 interceptions, while Dirk Braun led the Third Reich with 6 tackles.


The Toxic Waste's Don King, #20, gets some blocking on this 4th quarter interception

[RavennaAl]

Sasquatch 31 - Flaming Fairies 10

In a rematch from last years WMLMF championship game, the Canadian Sasquatch’s defense came up big with 5 sacks and 2 interceptions as they held Tommy Cruise, the leagues passing leader, to just 112 yards and cruised to an easy 31 - 10 victory.

Grog opened the scoring with a 28 yard run early in the first quarter, then scored again on a 17 yard pass to put the Bigfoot team up 14-0 at the end of one. James Leach returned a punt 84 yards for a TD for the Fairies, and an exchange of field goals by both teams made the halftime score 17 - 10.

Johnny Holmes returned the second half kick 65 yards to put the Fairies deep in Sasquatch territory. They were unable to move the ball, and Pat Medown’s field goal attempt was blocked, giving the big guys the ball at their 35. The one-two punch of Grog and Muckman overpowered the Fairy defense and Grogs 20 yard run bumped the score up to 24-10. Chappy’s interception of a Cruise pass gave the ball back to the Canadians. From there, it was all Muckman as once again the ’Quatch ran down the field at will, and Muckmans 12 yard TD catch made it 31-10. Cruise tried to rally his team, but Chappy’s second interception of the year effectively ended the game.

Stinkwater was an efficient 5-8-0 for 92 yards and 2 TD’s for the ’Quatch. Spook had 3 tackles and 2 sacks for the Sasquatch while the Fairies defense was led by Ron Simmons and Rod Stroker with 4 tackles each.

Muckman, #21, follows his lead blocker, Grog #32 on this run

[RavennaAl]

Zombies 13-Bozos 7

The Bozos gave the Zombies all that they could handle, but it wasn’t quite enough as New Zealand squeaked out a 13-7 victory over the hard luck clowns.

The Zombies took the opening kick off and drove the ball to the Bozo 14, but had to settle for Adam Vinatieri’s 31 yard field goal and a 3-0 lead. 5 ½ took the ensuing kick back 69 yards to give the clowns excellent field position at the 21. Three plays later, 2 Cents ran 20 yards for a TD and a 7-3 score. The teams exchanged possessions in a defensive slugfest, and Vinatieri’s 56 yard field goal at the end of the half made the score 7-6, Bozos.

Both teams displayed tough defenses in the second half, as the third quarter was scoreless. In the fourth, the Zombies moved the ball for a first and goal from the Bozo 9. They got the ball down to the 4 yard line, and the Bozos looked like they dodged a bullet when Vinatieri’s field goal attempt was blocked. A flag on the play, however, gave the Zombies another shot from the 2, and on fourth down, Jerome Bettis found a seam in the Bozo defense for a Td and a 13-7 lead. The Bozos had 2 last chances to try and even the score, but the Zombie defense held still as they escaped with a 13-7 victory.

Marcus Allen ran for 82 yards on 9 carries to lead the Zombies, while Pi was 7-14-0 for 109 yards for the clowns. Dice Six led the Bozo defense with 6 ½ tackles and a sack, while New Zealand was led by Jack Ham’s 5 ½ tackles.



2 Cents catches this screen pass in early action

[RavennaAl]

Mennonites 30 - Killer Bees 27

“Do you still believe in miracles?” The Mennonite surely must, as for the second week in a row they scored on the games final play, this time on a 60 yard field goal by Mathew Martin, to pull out a victory. The Bees tried, but couldn’t quite overcome 2 costly turnovers and 6 penalties for 50 yards.

The Amish team started the game off with excellent field position, thanks to Luthar Lamp’s 66 yard kick return. They moved the ball down to the Killer Bees 7 yard line but had to settle for a field goal by Martin. Kalamazoo struck back on Peter Pollen’s 47 yard TD run and a 7-3 lead. On the next series, Billy Bob Weisser hooked up with Lamp on a 44 yard throw for a TD and a 10-7 lead. Billy Yoder’s pick of an errant Kerry Kingbee pass set up the Amish at midfield. The Killer Bee defense held, and Martin’s 56 yard field goal made the score 13-7 as the first quarter came to an end.

Kalamazoo moved the ball to the Mennonite 20 yard line, but the drive stalled and Paul Inated’s 42 yard field goal trimmed the lead 13-10, which held up until halftime.

In the third quarter, Mudder Smucker caught a 12 yard toss from Weisser for a TD and a 20-10 lead. The Bees bounced back and made it 20-17 on Pollen’s 46 yard TD catch. Kalamazoo got the ball right back on a rare Lamp fumble, and marched to the Mennonite 8 yard line, but had to settle for another field goal and a 20-20 tie.

A stiff Killer Bee defense forced a punt, and their offense took over at their 11. With time running low, Kingbee found a wide open Jason Stinger, who raced 89 yards for a TD and a 27-20 lead. Weisser stayed calm, and found Steven Stucky open for a 60 yard bomb and once again the score was tied, 27all. With time running out, Kingbee tried to rally his team, but the Mennonite’s left defensive end, Jebediah Smith stepped in front of a pass at the Bee’s 43 for an interception with only 2 seconds left on the clock. Martin kicked his game winner as time expired, giving the Mennonite’s a most unexpected win.

Pollen finished the game with 100 yards rushing and a TD. Weisser had a poor day passing, but still completed 4-10-0 for 130 yards and 3 TD’s League leader Elliott Gould had 4 tackles for Kalamazoo while Sam Smucker had 4 tackles and a sack for the Mennonites.



Killer Bees' Mudd Dauber, #66, sacks Billy Bob Weisser

[styx]

that sounded like a excellent game al ,lots of scoring by two very tough teams,keep us posted buddy...................phil

You all are great in the keeping of stats!

[RavennaAl]

Thanks guys, the season's half over. Here's the standings after 5 games....

NORTH
TEAM ..... W/L............ PF............ PA
Sasquatch 5-0......... 166............ 111
Killer Bees.. 3-2......... 139............ 93
Bozos...... 1-3-1...... 125............ 138
Third Reich 0-5......... 117............ 197

UN_NORTH
Mennonites. 4-1........... 157........ 128
Zombies..... 3-2........... 106.......... 89
Toxic Waste 2-3........... 139......... 134
Fairies....... 1-3-1.......... 82.......... 141

[RavennaAl]

Games and odds for 'week' 6....

Sasquatch vs. Toxic Waste ( 'Quatch favored by 10 points )

Bozos vs. Mennonites ( Mennonites favored by 7 points )

Third Reich vs. Flaming Fairies ( Fairies favored by 7 points )

Killer Bees vs. Zombies ( Bees favored by 2 points )